According to scientific research, here’s the best way for men and women to recover in their relationship directly following an argument…
First, let’s get something straight. Arguing is NOT bad. Healthy, constructive arguing can be a very effective way of bonding in a relationship, as long as you aren’t trying to “win” the argument. Most of the time when people argue, they’re just seeking to be understood. To have their feelings validated. If you start every argument with the intention of trying to convince the other person to completely change their personal stance, you’re going to have a lot of unsatisfactory results. If you get frustrated and result in trying to hurt the other person’s feelings through insults, personal jabs and cheap shots, you’re going to eventually have a breakdown in communication. That’s NOT healthy. And it could lead to a point where one or both of you end up internalising your feelings and not expressing them at all, rather than have a constructive, passionate discussion. That’s a complete communication breakdown. So again, arguing can be healthy.
All of that said, that doesn’t change the fact that after a heated exchange, tensions are very high. And it may take a prolonged, uncomfortable period of time before things get back to normal.
Bucknell University in Pennsylvania just conducted some research into the fastest ways to make-up after an argument. And they’re very different for women and men.
GUYS… when you want to make up with your girlfriend or wife, the BEST way to reconcile, according to Bucknell , is to… CRY!
They say it’s the ultimate way to show you’re emotionally invested in the relationship and that you’re not going to let one argument affect your commitment.
On the other hand, LADIES, if you want to make up with your boyfriend or husband, they say the key is . . . “making a sexual advance.” The researchers say that it shows a man you’re, “still sexually accessible and, as such, do not want to end the relationship.” haha (No word as to how many guys were on the research team.)
How about you? How do you makeup after an argument?